November 11, 2005

Well another week has gone by...for some reason since last night I have been very depressed.
I just can't seem to be very happpy. I am not sure exactly why. I think about my parents alot since the holidays are coming up...I miss them terribly. I realize that it has been over 9 years since Mom passed away and 3 yeas since Dad passed away. The whole veterans holiday I start to think about my Dad and how proud I was of his miltary service.

Sometimes when people fight with their parents I just want to scream at them and ask how would you feel if both your parents are gone and you have no other close family!! But, I don't I realize that every family is different and everyone has a different relationship with their parents...good bad or indifferent. People who are older than me who have their parents don't know how lucky they are --the ones who act so indifferent to how I might feel when I talk about my mom or dad and how neat they were and what they used to do-it as though these people have no idea nor can comprehend how their actions affect me.

I guess I am just sad right now. I want things in my life to be different and I am trying to change some thing now...patience isn't one of my virtues with myself.